My SPAM file is always much larger than my inbox- an enduring testimony to the human propensity of taking a good gift, like the internet, and using it for inane purposes. Occasionally a real message gets thrown into the spam file, so I have to go through it and pull out what I want to save. It’s usually a yucky adventure, but somewhere along the line, I decided to make the best of it by collecting interesting spam headings that appear back-t0-back. Here are some actual spam headings that I found as I was emptying my files. As you will see, some of these headings go back a few months, but, taken together, they cover just about all of the major topics of spam messages except for the notification that a widow in Nigeria wants to give me a billion dollars.
How do I get out of debt: Unbelievable savings on generic meds
Debt elimination 101: Casino directory
To get out of debt: You can order anti-depressants
John McCain’s creative thinking: No study! Buy university diploma degree
Clinton reaches out to Obama: Help stop premature ejaculation
John McCain’s Monday with beach babes: Extreme hurts
The U. of Iowa offers concentration courses for religious service: Win big money
Sometimes, a single heading needs no accompaniment to be funny: "French have more sex in surveys than any other country."
And and finally, a single headline that demonstrates how even spammers have some degree of creativity and humor … “Sarah Jessica Parker arrested for gross negligee”